12 days of Christmas starts tomorrow!!

I started school this fall as some of you may know. It has become the next love of my life. I have learned more about myself in the past couple months than I have in my entire life. Not kidding. I didn't actually have all these revelations from WHAT I learned IN school, but from my attitude and activity DURING school. It's a long story, but the point is, I've sort of immersed myself in school. I didn't realize what a consuming personality I had. When I get hooked on something, just forget about it. When I'm committed, I'm committed. When I'm in , I'm in!! Anyway, my blogging time is spent in school now. The hours I used to spend blogging, I now spend in school. I do miss my blogging though, and I HAVE to get back to it. Even now, it's 2:21 a.m. people. I SHOULD be in bed for night's sake! What AM I doing???

Anyway, I 'm going to call blogging by a new name now. I'm calling it journaling to hopefully encourage myself to be better at it. I will eventually update the last couple months just for myself, but for now just bear with me.

I'm going to try to do the 12 days of Christmas like I did last year. I can not get into the Christmas spirit this year for fear that I will have to confront my sadness of not having my Angelia home for the holidays. My dear parents are going to Florida for a few months, but are leaving before Christmas so that Leah & Brent don't have to spend the holiday alone. But it doesn't change the fact that I will not have one of my children home. This is the first year & it feels terrible. The tears are running down my little cheeks as we speak. It just doesn't feel the same. I cannot imagine how parents feel who have actually lost one of their children. Lord, please never put that burden on me. I just couldn't live through it.