Dear Amy,

Well, thanks once again for a lovely visit at your house. Even with all our kiddos and their noise I find it so relaxing. It serves as almost an escape from some of the mundane chores of home. I love all the sharing and venting we do. I'm sometimes amazed at some of the things I learn about you. It's nice to know that even though we've been sisters forever we still have things to learn about each other.

You have strengths I definitely do not have, and they come from burdens of sadness I didn't know you carried. Interesting....very interesting. The moment I wish for your strengths I realize I would not want the burdens that you acquired to attain the strength. But, that is how strength comes. My burdens have been different than yours, not making one better or worse than others, just different. We experienced some of the same sadnesses such as Dad's death & some other things we spoke of, but we each internalized them in our own way. Our age difference had a part to do with that.

I just have to say that I'm sorry I wasn't the sibling that you needed during those times. I don't remember having the relationship with you that I've worked diligently to nurture amongst my own children. I know I have memory issues, but I 100% know that when Dad left the planet....well, so did I. The loss was so great for each of us in our own way and being a teenager I just wanted to escape from all of you. Seeing us as a family meant that part of the family was missing. I clearly remember Mom pleading with me as a teenager saying, "What is so wrong with us that you don't want to spend time with us?" (so sorry for that pain I caused you Mom. :(   There was nothing wrong with any of you. Being absent meant not being present to the absence of others. Understand? Looking back, I'm just so sorry. I hope my attempts at sisterhood now make up for the sister I wasn't then. I love you Amy. You're more than my sister, your a best friend.

Love, Lori

Dear Angelia,

So sorry you couldn't come for dinner tonight. We missed having you. We always miss you even though you don't know it. You and Brent add a special light when you come and visit. We'll be sad if and when you move on to bigger & better places. It's nice to know you are busy making a life for you & your hubby.

I'm so proud of you & of the big dreams you aspire to. Never let them go Leah, never. Don't settle for less than what you were made for. Keep making plans, making adjustments where necessary, and not accepting excuses from yourself or others for anything less than your best. Always give 110% & leave people and places better than you found them. Remember your gifts. You know what they are. Embrace them and know you are a blessing to those who are lucky enough to get "your call". We all love you Leah!

Love, Mom

Dear Josh, Kirsten, Aaron, & Dayton,

You have no idea how it makes me feel to see all of you almost squabble over who gets to help mommy. When it's time to cook each day you each go scrambling for your stools and run over to the counter to help. To be honest, it's a lot harder to do with all of you at one time. This is one of the reasons why each of you has "your day". On that day you each know it's your turn to be my special helper. Some days though you can't help yourselves & you all want to help. How long this will last I don't know, but I want you to know how much I treasure it and each of you.  Love, Mommy

Dear Alexa

Today I had the precious opportunity to do something for you that typically is the almost coveted right of all parents. When our children are sick we want nothing more than to hold them, care and coddle over them, whisper sweet promises of wellness in their tiny ears, and pray that they heal quickly. Last night your father told me I could bring you home to stay the night. He had already sent you home with me another day this week for a few hours, hours which I worshipped needless to say. I thought he was kidding when he said I could take you home again, but this time to sleep over. :)  He then also told me that you were not feeling well. Needless to say, you definitely were not feeling well, and didn't sleep well, but the pleasure was all mine in caring for you when you needed a parent the most. I pray I have the opportunity again. I love you Alexa.   Love, Mommy Lori