I love a true story

Lonnie & I took the kids to see a wonderful movie during the Christmas vacation. We don't go to the movies much, but decided it would be a fun activity with the kids. If you like pets, especially dogs, YOU HAVE TO SEE THIS MOVIE! Watch the trailer by clicking on : Marley & Me .Those of you who I KNOW will like this movie would be Maren, Mom, Leah, & Angie, especially Angie since she is such a dog person. The best part is that it's a true story.

Christmas with Tessa!

My amazing son Josh told us on Christmas Eve that he would wake us at 8 a.m. to open gifts. What? You're not going to wake us up at the crack of dawn? I know he is going to wake up MUCH earlier than that & lay in his bed with his mind whirling with excitement. What a kid. Anyway, funny enough, his sister calls us from Florida at 7:30. Who would have thought the 18-year-old not living at home would wake us up before the 10 year old? It really made me laugh.

Christmas had its traditional start of Tessa needing to receive her gift first. Yes, I did say Tessa. She's our 11 year old dog. Every year we sadly say, "This is probably Tessa's last Christmas."

People rarely believe it when we say our dog opens gifts. This year she started especially early. As soon as we had a few gifts under the tree she started unwrapping them. We rewrapped them & just watched her after that.

Christmas morning she was OVER THE TOP!! She knew we had more than one gift for her. After she opened her toy she was not content to go chew it. She knew there were dog treats under the tree so she proceeded to start unwrapping ANYONE'S gift. We thought she was hysterical. She was helping the kids open their gifts, & they felt ever so obliged to let her help. It was obvious she was having such a good time.

Tessa does this at any event where there is unwrapping going on. On birthdays when she is not receiving a gift, she still wants to unwrap. We will miss our Tessa SO MUCH when she is gone. She truly adds such joy to our lives. She was my gift to Lonnie many Christmas's ago. It was an especially difficult time for us then, and she came at just the right time.

Tessa & the "unwrapping"!

12th day of Christmas

Today was a day of cooking. Since we are not normally home for Christmas Eve, I wanted to do something special for my family: Make a yummy turkey dinner with all the extras. I even made a pumpkin pie. It's wonderful going to someones home for a lovely turkey dinner, but you never get the added joy of days of leftovers. Ah...this year I had enough leftovers + some to even freeze for later in the winter. Mmmmm.......... I'm psyched!

Anyway, Josh went shopping with Lonnie & the kiddos helped me make a pumpkin pie & the stuffing for the turkey. They were so excited to help. Parents who do not teach their children the value of work by letting them help out (especially in the kitchen), in my opinion, are cheating them of valuable learning opportunities & amazing parent/child time. I do find it stressful to have all of them helping at the same time, so whoever's "day" it is that day, is the one who helps. This particular day though, there was enough to do for the little ones to take turns. They were so proud.

I received an early Christmas gift today too! My final grades are in and I ended with an A (99%) in both of my classes. I am one happy girl! Thank you Heavenly Father for helping me to stay awake all those late nights & for keeping me sane the next day with only little bits of sleep. Merry Christmas Lori :)

11th day of Christmas

Two days before Christmas not a thing had been wrapped for the family. I was stressing about this big time. Josh, being the amazing little man, had a plan. The conversation went as follows:
Josh: Mom, I have the night all planned out.
Lori: Uh, Josh, I'm the mom. You don't just tell me the plan.
Josh: Mom, I have a plan, and this IS how we are going to do it.
Lori: Excuse me?
Josh: You are going to going into your office and shut the door and wrap. I am making dinner for the kids. Then we are getting ready for bed & watching a movie. I will take care of everything Mom. You just go & wrap. Don't worry.
Lori: (completely humbled now) That is so NICE Josh. You are the best.


A while later, Lori checks in on the kids & finds:

• Josh made dinner
• He had taken it upstairs & let them eat at this little table in Aaron's room (I know they thought that was fun)
• PJs were on
• Movie was over
• Josh was helping kids straighten up their rooms before bed

God must love me to have sent me a child like this. Having sad that though, Leah was so helpful too. My children are such a help to me. I am so humbled by their love & devotion to the needs of their family.

Here are two of my favorite pics from a Christmas Eve at my mom's from 2006.

10th day of Christmas

The 10th day of Christmas was focused on Kirsten and Aaron. They have two other siblings in other homes. We visit them every other week. Their sister is in a group home and we went to visit her on this day. The kids made crafts that I had brought for them & had such a fun time. I also took sugar cookies, the icing, and the sprinkles so they could decorate cookies & have them for a snack with some hot cocoa. I could tell Rachel had a nice time. I feel so bad for that little girl. Of all four children, she is the only one who does not have a foster family. It breaks my heart.

9th day of Christmas

Today was our Christmas Eve get-together that wasn't on Christmas Eve. We always go to my parents that evening & open gifts. My brother and sister and their families are there as well. We eat way too much & have a blessed time together. My parents being the "grandparents of the year" decided to spend the holiday in Florida this year. They did not want Leah & Brent to be alone. My parents have a home there too & invited the kids to come & spend Christmas with them. Leah & Brent are so homesick that I know they are thrilled. My parents will leave early tomorrow morning (12/22) to decorate & get ready for their very excited guests.

My family got the kiddos amazing gifts. They spoil them way too much. Having aunts and uncles is the best.

Because my parents will not be home for Christmas, we did some new things this year. We always have a family tree trimming at my mom's. Everyone gets together, enjoys another opportunity to eat, decorates the tree & just hangs out. A few weeks ago my sister & brother in law decided to have the tree trimming at their house so that the family tradition continued. How cool was that? We all took a yummy breakfast food and had a gigantic breakfast. We then decorated my sister's tree with some of the family decorations. The kids had such a fun time. Kirsten especially LOVED decorating the tree. My mom always had a special ornament for each child with their name on it. Each foster child had one as well. I still remember driving somewhere with her as a child to go pick up one of these "treasured" ornaments. You just knew you were going on a special errand. My mom always wanted everyone to feel loved and wanted. She is just such a beautiful person. Thanks for the special day Amy & Matt!

8th day of Christmas

This day was especially fun for the kids. We had breakfast with Santa at Codorus. There were yummy pancakes and lots of smiles.



In the evening, the Christmas fun continued. I am just like all the other parents who enjoy the holidays because of their children's performances. It was such a joy to watch Angelia in the Nutcracker for the last few years, and it was SO SAD to not have her performing this year. She's an ol' married lady now in Florida. I couldn't even bring myself to go see The Nutcracker this year. Looking back, I wish I would have. It would have made my heart smile to go see all her friends backstage afterwards. Darn....wish I would have thought of that.

Christmas brings us another performance now as well. This was Josh's third piano recital. I so look forward to this since I hear him practicing every day. He usually plays two or three songs, but this year he gave us an extra special treat. Typically his piano teacher, Miss Pat, accompanies the younger students on at least one or two of their pieces. She did the same this year, but Josh also played one by himself, The Carol of the Bells. This was exciting to us because he played the song by ear. He never had the music to play by. She would just show him a little each week and then he would practice it all week. The funny thing is, he plays the song without the music MUCH faster than the songs he has music for. I know absolutely NOTHING about music so maybe this is normal. I just found it amazing that he could memorize like he did. We are so proud of you Josh. Every year you get better.

Turn off my music & listen to Josh playing at the recital.






Afterwards, Miss Pat has a little get-together for the kids in a room at the church. They enjoy all kinds of treats and a cake with everyone's name on it. They have a nice time. Thanks Miss Pat! Lonnie's parents came to watch, but had to leave afterwards. My parents came as always & had a great time.

7th day of Christmas!

Oh, the gingerbread house. This is a family tradition that we started last year I think. Sadly, I don't think I ever made one with Angelia. I hope she makes one when she has kiddos a LONG TIME FROM NOW. She is very artistic & would do a beautiful job.

The kids love it, but it never turns out like the pics on the box. Josh & I always laugh about that.
Regardless, the have a terrible amount of fun doing it.

6th day of Christmas!

My guy is still feeling under the weather. I just cannot believe it. Our family has been plagued with one sickness after another this year. I've never seen anything like it. I pray next year does not resemble this year.

I must admit I'm getting nervous about getting my shopping done. You can't ask people to watch sick kids, but I am not nearly ready. This is also my last week of school for this block. I have some major hives from my nerves. Between not being ready for the holidays, and needing to finish my final projects for school, I am a wreck. So far I have an A in both of my classes, but my final project is a quarter of my grade. I work best under pressure, but this is a bit much. Hm.....

5th day of Christmas!

Our Christmas event for today was to be caroling with the Mary Kay girlfriends. I knew my kiddos would love it, but with Josh's flu/viral thing it was not to be. We resorted to our annual decoration making. I didn't know if Josh was up to doing anything, but it seemed to be a nice distraction. It wasn't. :( The poor kid is miserable. The decorations were fun to make, but are not going to hold up. The glitter doesn't want to stay on! Any suggestions? Anyway, they are beautiful, but a giant waste of time if they don't turn out like you had imagined. Oh well. Lesson learned. They can't go on the tree, but they look nice in my pretty bowl. :)



We actually got our tree the first weekend in December & decorated it, but we like to add special things the kids make as they bring them home from school or make them here. We made our annual trek to a local tree farm. We almost wrecked the car when we reached the farm because almost all of the trees were gone. The farmer is no longer continuing his business, & his children are not interested in taking it on. It seemed so sad. I almost cried. We had been going there for sooooo long. Kirsten & Aaron thought it was so fun to pick out a tree & cut it down. Josh picked the tree this year & did a very nice job of it.

4th day of Christmas!

Sickness has just plagued my little family this year. Tuesday morning Josh woke up with a rash that covered his whole body from head to toe, an itchy rash at that. More Christmas fun, oh yeah. Unfortunately, thanks to the rash & some misbehaving little people today, our planned gingerbread house making was postponed. :(

As for Josh, the doctor said the rash is not contagious, it's a reaction to something. Uh...like what? It would be nice to know. Anyway, he was annoyingly evasive, and I couldn't get much out of him. Well, after talking to Dr. Maren, the guru of allergies, I don't really think it is an allergic reaction to anything. My family doctor said it might be viral if he had a fever or a sore throat. Ok, well your nurse took his temp & he DID have a fever and he's had a sore throat on and off for days. Last night his throat was really sore again. I think it's viral. The poor kid feels terrible and is miserable.

Anyway, after Josh's doctor appointment we had to go to Walmart to get him a prescription. We had to wait 30 minutes for it to be filled so we shopped for Lonnie while we were there. Dear Lonnie's not getting much this year, he already received his gift: a new car. We were going to buy some crappy, used car, but decided since we are used to having at least one new car that you can count on to be reliable, that we should buy a new one. LORI, has only driven the thing 14 miles in 3 weeks, so that's why it's LONNIE'S gift. :) I got "the van". Yeah. :(


The reason we bought the car was because I made the PAINFUL decision to give up my Mary Kay car that I had earned.

Lori & her Grand Prix car party from March 2007.
To make a long bittersweet story, short, in order for a Sales Director to keep her car she has to maintain a certain production in sales. The minute we were blessed with Kirsten & Aaron, my business took a backseat. Some might wonder why I would let something slip away that I have worked at for such a long time. Call me a bonehead, but when we took on the foster children I had no idea what their special needs were & the time I was saying "yes" to. You assume there will be counseling, but that's all you know initially. With every extra child your life is busier. Duh..I know this. I just didn't know I would be going to 300-400+ miles worth of appointments every month. That was a little change for me.

Anyway, my business gradually went downhill from there. I just couldn't maintain my car production any longer and my silver streak had to go or I had to bust my butt & get back to work. It was the third car I had earned with Mary Kay. Each time you earn one, you just trade your present Mary Kay car in for a new one. You pay for only part of the insurance & get free inspections, registration, etc. :) It's a sweet deal, but you have to work for it. My "work" is somewhere else now. I'm still a sales director, but am trying to give my business a boost. More on that in the new year. :) Anyway, my decision was bittersweet because this is what I "asked for". I always wanted a big family. Always. Four isn't big, but it's big enough for now. I just have to pray that Heavenly Father has his hand on us & will bless my decision on where I am choosing to "work". I love my little family.

3rd day of Christmas

Josh & I had a fun Christmas day today. We went and did the shopping for those he wanted to buy for. Fun, fun. Then when we got home we set out to FINALLY finish decorating. We had previously gotten our tree and decorated it with the kids. I just love decorating my house though & between having one sickness after another lately and doing schoolwork, it just has not happened. My kids LOVE to decorate. They've watched me & helped me do it for years. Well, Josh & I had one hour to get done before an appointment. The statement, "Work expands for the time allowed," was usually my decorating timeframe. I normally take hours to decorate. I enjoy it & don't feel like rushing. But today, it was just a I NEED TO GET THIS DONE EVENT. Josh was SO HELPFUL, & we finished in time! He just kept saying, "I love Christmas." He will make a great husband someday.

Oh, and Leah, I am sorry. Here's another picture with your actual tin. It's the silver bucket one. Is that better? Again, Brad & I searched REALLY hard for just the perfect tin. :)

2nd day of Christmas

Woohoo! The 2nd day of Christmas brought me a stomach flu. I was about ready to prepare for church when, uh...., mother nature had other plans. We'll just leave it at that. Sorry if that was TMI for some of you. Josh went to my mom's instead to help her make cookies while the little people took naps. (Yes, they STILL nap on the weekends. Can you believe it??) When Josh got home we had a "dinner and a movie night" with the kids. We watched a fun Christmas movie called Fred Claus as we all huddled around the coffee table eating dinner. Happily, my food stayed where it belonged. :)

Speaking of Christmas baking with my mom, a few days ago we went to her house to make our annual Flitch candy. It is an amazingly wonderful rich confection full of peanut butter and sugar! Mmmm..... Leah gave us all STRICT orders that now that she was married she was to receive an ENTIRE tin like the rest of us. My mom makes each of us a tin as a yearly treat. My brother and sister and I go CRAZY over this. Part of it is the taste of course, but part of it is the tradition of it, and part of it is just knowing SHE made it. We help, but it's Mom who orchestrates the whole event.

So Leah we did make you some Flitch, but Mom & Brad aren't going to have a lot of room to take things so are just bringing you & Brent each your own tin. Check it out below. Brad & I looked long and hard for the perfect tins for you. The big one is mine, of course, because of the kiddos. The next size is Mom's & then everyone else got the third size. Then the two smaller ones (one is blue & the other is black w/a gold lid) are for you & Brent. We thought so much of you that we thought you should each have your own. I've posted two different pictures to make sure you see them & even highlighted them for you! Enjoy!

1st day of Christmas

We started our 12 days of Christmas out with my parents this year. We took the kids to Rocky Ridge to see Christmas Magic, but started the night with a fun meal at Fuddrucker's. My parents gave us a "certificate" to go out to eat. Hm.... I had never seen one of these certificates before. Thank goodness their was a $20 bill attached to the cert. I am not quite sure the restaurant would have accepted it. Thanks a bunch guys!!!



They have 400,000 lights spread out over the park, walking trails, a wonderful train display, and of course, Santa.


Kirsten & Aaron had never been there so they were especially excited and Josh was excited to be able to have little people to share it with. The car line just to park was unusually long this year. It brought back the memories of going there the first time with Angelia & Lonnie's parents. Angelia was only four or five. She could probably remember. Anyway, it was fun to think of her when she was so little. I took a picture of a decoration that we have on our tree that she made when she was four.




It's weird to do these Christmas activities without her. Leah......I hope you are making new traditions of your own. For you and the grandparents......reminisce with the 12 days of Christmas 2007.

12 days of Christmas starts tomorrow!!

I started school this fall as some of you may know. It has become the next love of my life. I have learned more about myself in the past couple months than I have in my entire life. Not kidding. I didn't actually have all these revelations from WHAT I learned IN school, but from my attitude and activity DURING school. It's a long story, but the point is, I've sort of immersed myself in school. I didn't realize what a consuming personality I had. When I get hooked on something, just forget about it. When I'm committed, I'm committed. When I'm in , I'm in!! Anyway, my blogging time is spent in school now. The hours I used to spend blogging, I now spend in school. I do miss my blogging though, and I HAVE to get back to it. Even now, it's 2:21 a.m. people. I SHOULD be in bed for night's sake! What AM I doing???

Anyway, I 'm going to call blogging by a new name now. I'm calling it journaling to hopefully encourage myself to be better at it. I will eventually update the last couple months just for myself, but for now just bear with me.

I'm going to try to do the 12 days of Christmas like I did last year. I can not get into the Christmas spirit this year for fear that I will have to confront my sadness of not having my Angelia home for the holidays. My dear parents are going to Florida for a few months, but are leaving before Christmas so that Leah & Brent don't have to spend the holiday alone. But it doesn't change the fact that I will not have one of my children home. This is the first year & it feels terrible. The tears are running down my little cheeks as we speak. It just doesn't feel the same. I cannot imagine how parents feel who have actually lost one of their children. Lord, please never put that burden on me. I just couldn't live through it.

the tears of a family

It's been a rough month already here in our little family. Maybe not rough to some, but it's all in the eye of the beholder I guess.

Miss Kirsten had a sibling visit this month. These visits happen every other week. Her & Aaron get together w/ their two natural siblings for a visit. They usually go well, but this week it was just too much for the little soul. She was quite grouchy by the time we got home, and tears about nothing soon followed. You know the kind. Your child is complaining about one thing, but their real problem is something else. We had that kind. Finally, she admitted she really missed her family, even her parents. The tears came hard. The tears stayed long. I felt SO BAD for her. Leah asked me later if it bothered me that Kirsten missed her mom. Oh my word, NO!! Those children have years of memories with their families. Not every moment was a bad one. At this point in time, I cannot replace one year with us for 4-5 years of her natural parents. It all takes time. She hasn't cried like that since she came. It was so healthy for her to let it all out. I just sat & held her as she cried. It was all I could do not to cry as well, but I really felt like she needed me to be strong.

Next comes Mr. Josh. This was a bad week for him too. We found out he definitely has a stress fracture and/or ligament problem with his foot. We had xrays taken & the foot doctor gave him a funny little boot to wear. I call him Iron Man now. It really reminds me of that movie. Josh also had to have 3 freckles/moles removed from his face, neck, & arm that were bad. They are sending them to the lab, & we'll have the results next week. Josh was so nervous about it that he had nightmares & woke up the next morning in tears. Some children worry so much about shots, & the word "removing" always sounds painful. Anyway, he did fine. I'll feel better after we get the results back though.

Mrs. Leah has been crying for home for weeks now. I THINK the official verdict is in that her & Brent are moving home in the spring. I THINK they are going to McDaniel, and Leah already has a job lined up when she gets home. Regardless of all the details, the poor thing is terribly homesick. I never thought those words would come from my child's mouth. I'm still going through shock on this one.

Mrs. Lori also suffered her own little tears this week. I was thinking that I was pregnant, and ok, hoping I was. Reasons this is so dumb:

1. I'm too old
2. Our money is way too tight
3. My OCD husband would go over the edge.
   
4. My plate is too full already.

Dumb or not, a person's heart is the way it is. I've always believed that we came to this Earth with dreams from Heavenly Father already placed in our hearts. We can't always choose what we long for. Sometimes no matter how hard you try to push it away or fill it with other things or other people, some dreams always creep back in. I've prayed for that desire to leave, but the yearning for another baby that I know I can KEEP never goes away. So when I thought that I could be pregnant I was filled with elation. Now I'm just filled with grief because I know I'm not. The death of a dream is just always painful. Say whatever you want, their my tears & I'm allowed to cry them. :(

I'm going to vote!

I'm embarrassed to admit this, but I've never voted. I've never felt that my vote would matter. I was never passionate about who would govern the little world I lived in. But this election, yes this election, it's all different. If a person can feel "impressed or inspired" to vote a certain way, than I have been. I am overcome with anxiety over it. I can't believe it myself. I have been on the verge of tears for days now. I know it sounds ridiculous, but SOMETHING is making me so emotional. For no reason at all, I just feel like crying. I could barely go to sleep last night I was worrying about this election so much. Call me dramatic, call me whatever.....I don't care. A terrible feeling comes over me when I think about Obama. A dear friend asked me if I thought it came from all the false info flying around. Sadly, I don't think it's all false, and sadder yet, is that I don't think it comes from any info at all. You know how you just "get a feeling" about someone. Typically these are people you actually meet, but not necessarily. Well, that's the feeling that I get. I just cannot shake it.

I"m a firm believer in "our circle". What is "our circle"? Our circle are the people you surround yourself with. They are the friends, some of which, you wish your teenager didn't have. They are the people you take advice from. They are the people you work with or go to church with. The are people you spend time with. Obama's circle does not give me any warm fuzzies. He is far too worldly for me which is why many Americans are voting for him. The church talks about this all the time, being "in the world", but not "of the world". Many people have their blinders on about this. I pray, at the last minute, their blinders fall off. I pray that they do PRAY about their vote. I pray they feel inspired on who to vote for. I am just praying and I'm going to continue to do so till this thing is over.

my husband

As I'm cleaning up the kitchen after dinner, Kirsten is making all these little trips in and out of the room. She is taking nail files, markers, and candies into the living room. I realize she is giving Lonnie a beauty treatment. She feels like a million dollars because she has his complete attention. She loves every minute of it (and so does he). The delight in her face brings tears into my eyes. I am just so emotional lately.

This brings back such sweet remembrances of Lonnie & Angelia. She used to do the same thing. He would sit there patiently as she entertained them both with markers and lipsticks. I even had a pic of it at one time. Boy, would I LOVE to get my hands on that one now. No, my husband is not a cross dresser. :) He really does love his daughters, but just has the hardest time showing it. He knows girls love to play in all that "stuff" (& he loves the attention - the big sap!) Anyway, the whole thing was just way cute!

I managed to grab this picture. Lonnie said, "You're not blogging this are you?" What me????? I can't imagine.